March 08, 2024

A Hankering Girl

              I was home sick, and I did not understand what I could do or what I should do in my life. When I came to the United States, I was excited to start my new life. In Nepal, I lived with my family, and I felt happy and strong because I had support from my family. I have been in Chicago since 2016. I came with my husband, and I was thrilled and happy, but a little bit nervous. I had many dreams for United States, including jobs and careers. At first, I thought I just needed time to practice speaking and learn the language, but after eight years, I still feel like a new immigrant in Chicago because nothing has changed in my life as I expected. Therefore, I still feel home sick. I still miss my family because I always talked and shared my emotions and problems with them. If I understood the language and knew my neighbors, I would have an easier life in Chicago. Thus, nowadays, I try to forget about my previous life in Nepal, and I forget how to be happy and confident in life. However, I still push my life to be strong and independent without my family.

              One of the parts I have embraced is education, which was my biggest dream when I came to Chicago. In Nepal, I finished my education, but I could not work because the education was not useable in daily life. Although I finished my education in Nepal, I had felt like an uneducated person, and could not make a better life. In Nepal, the education system does not use good methods or time management. Everyone can finish their studies, but they can’t find any work. When I moved to Chicago, I heard about modern educational methods, and I wanted to study in college. In Chicago, I like the teaching method, flexibility, and support for financial problems. I like that I can take online or in person courses and don’t have any age limitation in education. This wasn’t possible in Nepal. In Nepali education, if students didn’t have money, they could not study in school or college. In addition, there is no flexibility because the government doesn’t prioritize the education system or regulations. In Chicago, I like the education system and regulation because it has helped all residents who live here. Therefore, I started to study in college and finish my education, so I can start a professional job to make batter life in United states.

              In contrast, I have had a hard time learning the language in the United States. Due to my weak English language, I lost confidence, and I feel uncomfortable in Chicago. In Nepal, I was a confident and capable person, and I could and dare to ask anything what I wanted, and I could walk and talk clearly without nervousness or confusion. After eight years, I speak only little bit of English, but I feel uncomfortable when I speak because I haven’t studied much. In Chicago, if I go to a kids’ hospital, school, or office, I have to use a translator because I don’t understand how to describe my situation or confusion. Before I moved to Chicago, I graduated at college level, and worked in school. However, now I still feel lost in everywhere because of poor English language. However, I try to be confident and happy in Chicago, so I started to learn to English language. Nowadays I started to be taking a class in college and tried to accept and speak fluently English in Chicago, so I found some of ways to stay happy and confident in Chicago.

              In conclusion, I was happy to start my studies in United States because I like educational rules and method, and equality for everyone. Now, I have forgotten how to speak with confidence and without nervousness with people and how to relax without talking with my own language Nepali. Before I moved, I never thought about my life without my language, but I am trying to speak and learn English. I realize that if I want to make a better life, I need to do hard work in life. I need to know how to adjust in society, make a friend, and do any work confidently and individually without family’s help. I think I am not homesick anymore, and I can live without my family. Nowadays, I realize that I should find other ways to stay relaxed and be confident in my life. I will try to make friends in United States to talk and share everything, and I think I will be successful this way because I am starting study in Chicago college. I hope everything will be better and perfect in my future life, and I wish to be happy and feel relaxed in my life.